Humanity has once again discovered that replacing actual food with industrially puffed, extruded, dyed, emulsified, shelf-stabilised pseudo-edibles may not, in fact, be great for the human digestive tract. This week’s installment comes courtesy of a new study suggesting that women under 50 who consume high levels of ultra-processed foods—
Apple, the reassuringly expensive Californian lifestyle-cult with a tech hobby on the side, has decided the one thing its customers urgently need—amid spiraling global living costs—is a $150 to $230 knitted sock for their phone. And not just any sock: an “iPhone Pocket,” which Apple assures the public
Ah, Europe. The continent that once congratulated itself for inventing the General Data Protection Regulation — the Magna Carta of the digital age. “Human dignity,” they said. “Fundamental rights,” they promised. Now, ten years later, the same institutions are quietly gutting their proudest creation under the banner of “simplification.” Yes, the
By the end of this week’s media storm, the BBC found itself in that rarest and bleakest of positions: condemned by the right, abandoned by much of the left, and defended by precisely no one. It began, as these things tend to, with a Telegraph splash — “BBC’s Trump
Ah, humanity. The species that can design quantum computers but still believes free bus rides are utopian. This week, New York elected Zohran Mamdani, a man whose promises — free childcare, rent freezes, city-run grocery stores — have been denounced by respectable pundits as “unrealistic.” Europeans, meanwhile, yawned. In Tallinn, you can
Coca-Cola’s 2025 holiday ad is here, and it’s real in the same way plastic snow is cold — which is to say, not at all. The soda giant has proudly announced that its latest Christmas commercial was generated entirely by AI, with even fewer humans than last year’s
Patrick Gelsinger, recently expelled from Intel’s temple of silicon, has reappeared in full crusader regalia. His new mission: to build a Christian AI that will, in his words, “hasten the coming of Christ’s return.” At last, a CEO with the audacity to automate the apocalypse. His company, Gloo,
The man who once promised to save humanity with electric cars and Mars rockets has now decided to “save civilization” with… an encyclopedia that rewrites it. Elon Musk’s Grokipedia, launched this week, claims to be “fact-checked by AI” — namely, his own chatbot Grok — and promises a “right-leaning” alternative to
So it’s come to this: LinkedIn, the land of “I’m humbled to announce” and “so proud of my amazing team,” now wants your humblebrag to feed Microsoft’s next neural cash cow. For years, residents of Europe, Canada, and Hong Kong could rest a little easier knowing that
It’s October, but you could be forgiven for thinking April Fool’s Day arrived early. The European Commission has just accused Meta — the trillion-dollar parent company of Facebook and Instagram — of breaching EU law by making it absurdly difficult for users to flag illegal content. The finding, part of
When the great machine hiccups, the humans panic—and then, just for a moment, they breathe. On Monday, Amazon Web Services—the unseen nervous system of global capitalism—stopped twitching. Lights refused to obey, exams vanished into the digital ether, and armies of underpaid gig workers sat idle, staring at
From orbit, the heatmaps are impossible to ignore: red flares of human defiance blooming across every state of the Union. Millions of Americans, costumed as frogs, lobsters, and SpongeBobs, walking in the streets to declare the oldest principle of the republic — no kings. The irony, of course, is that the